Thursday, April 29, 2010

Trust Earned, Trust Broken

There isn’t an easy to answer to the question:
What do you do when trust is broken in a partnership.

As Wagner and Muller (2009) state in their book, the positive and gushy feelings we have toward our partner almost completely reverse themselves at a major trust breach. The behaviors you might see in someone who has been violated would be situtational of course, but probably some form of withholding praise, neglecting situations, a breakdown of communication, and other resistance behaviors that could easily tear that partnership apart would be present.

In a business, the tension of a broken relationship can have dramatic consequences. Consider a merge of companies or an acquisition, and the divided cultures already in place. Othen the bought out company (acquisition) is going to their management fired, and the dominant culture will take place, unleashing lots of negativity. In other situations, companies can be divided up into camps of people. It makes the company inefficient, and it’s a drag to be there.

This simple experiment in psychology has shown the implications of trust and fairness. Let’s say you are paired with a stranger in a room, and you are both given $100. You are told that in this scenario, if you and your partner exchange the $100 bills, then you both get $150. A positive outcome for both. However, if one partner gives his share, and the other partner does not, the unfair partner gets $200 dollars. They can also choose to keep their original $100. In this situation, how would you choose? How much do you trust a stranger? How do you know you won’t be robbed?

This is a very simplified understanding of game theory, but as pointed out by (Wagner and Muller, 2009), this is the same mindset used in the cold war. One side could nuke the other, and essentially win if they struck quick enough, and many brilliant people thought that was correct. Luckily, whew, our world avoided that devastation.

Now here's what happens 18% of the time with a stranger. Both exchange money in a fair trade and get $150 each. These respondents say they felt the other person ‘looked like a good person’, or ‘seemed genuine’. Maybe these instincts are correct, though they require much self-discipline and trust in another.

There is no easy way out of the pit…
If you have violated trust, consider making amends quickly as possible. The world does turn, and so does bitterness. Make amends, and show some behavioral change. Show that person you are genuine. If you have reasonably tried for amends, and the partnership falls apart, allow it, and move on.

A final thought:
Living life authentically means you will have misunderstandings and possibly severe breaches of trust. As difficult as these things are, you are so much more powerful of a person if you decide to take the higher road. Forgiveness, kindness, understanding others from their short comings is not easy for anyone, but it is a mark of an enlightened person.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Partnerships: 1 + 1 = 10

In the business, finding someone who complements you may be the single biggest difference between success and failure.

One of the cautionary partnership tales, my personnel favorite of the stories in
"The Power of 2" (Wagner and Muller, 2009) is about the charmed company Disney. Disney in 1984 was looking for a new CEO, and no candidate was more impressive then Michael Eisner. He is portrayed as creative, quick thinker, impulsive and also well versed in business. However, there was another canidate that impressed the board but in a different way. Frank Wells - an astute business man, intelligent scholar, calm, collected, measured and focused. Disney couldn't pick 1, so they got the pair. Together Eisner/Wells would take Disney into something of a golden age. Movies classics: The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast and the Lion King were made. The disney amusement parks thrived, and merchandise was selling very well. All this time, the Eisner/Wells bond was incredibily strong and they made millions for themselves and Disney.

Everything changed in 1994. Wells was killed on impact in helicopter crash during a retreat. Eisner mourned the lost of his beloved partner, and rather then take on a new partner tried to forgo the Disney CEO path alone. Disaster was at every turn with Eisner at the helm. His impulses turned to something of a mania, and having no person to balance him in his decisions, the Disney franchise started to take severe financial hits. Wells was forgotten. Eventually Eisner's poor decisions and impulsive behavior had the Disney board questioning if he was ever responsbile for the Wells/Eisner success. Eisner was fired in 2004.

It's not that Eisner was a bad CEO. It's just that what he brought to the table was not enough by itself. The same might have been true for Wells, if the roles were reversed. Sometimes 1 person has the the power of 1 person. But take two people together who can form something greater then themselves, and you can have a whole new creation.

So what are the elements that make a good partnership.
Below are the 8 competencies needed (Wagner and Muller, 2009), and i've written out individualized paragraphs about each section.

1. Complementary Strengths - We need people different then us. Consider the dynamics of a pair when the strengths are divided up unevenly. An example a lot of Americans might be familar with is the President/Vice President strengths that make the pair a lot stronger. For instance, in the early 2000s, George W. Bush's 'compassionate conservatism' was complemented by the hawkish attitudes of Dick Cheney and it made for a strong conservative team. The Obama/Biden ticket strengths have Biden characterized as solid reputation and experience, and Obama has the youthfilled, dynamic, change agent persona.

2. A Common Mission - The mission has to be the same. If one of us wants to climb a mountain, and the other wants a straddle up a hill, we got a problem no matter how much the too like each other. The mission does not need to be sought after for the same reason. Again with the mountain climber example - one may climb the mountain as a way of conquering a personal goal, and the other may climb the mountain because they want the bragging rights of accomplishing such a task. The end result has to be agreed up, and more detailled and well communicated it is, the more likely that partnership will be strong.

3. Fairness - I'll go into it in detail with the next post - when partnerships fail, but, fairness is a critical element.

4. Trust - We form partnerships because we can not do it alone, or prefer not too. Trust is the glue that holds the partnership together. Where trust is questioned, there is no trust. Again i'll have more to say in the next post.

5. Acceptance - Indie rock band, the Postal Service said it best "everything is perfect from such great heights". As you work with the partner, and get to know him better, you might see things that are turn offs. Big egos, dependability, sharp-tongued, risk adverse - you name it, you'll see problems. Accepting the person as they are goes a long way in making a partnership more tolerable for both parties.

6. Forgiveness - How much of a breach can be handled, that's hard to say. Only 18% of strong partnerships ever forgo a serious breach of contract. Poor partnerships will see more breaches of trust. Whether or not the pair goes forward is what is most critical.

7. Communicating - One of the best chapters in this book is about communication. I think one of key things here is that communication "builds" collaboration. The more communication there is, and the higher quality it is, the more bridges that pair can cross together. Communicating well is ultimately an act of being vulnerable enough to be open to others and being authentic

8. Unselfishness - Egos will kill it.


Next blog posting - when partnerships unravel.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Partnerships

I heard a speaker say recently - ‘When we’re young we have big dreams and no resources to accomplish them; when we’re adults we have pitiful dreams and all the power in the world to accomplish them’. Often time we can accomplish our dreams with the aid of a partner. Sometimes it’s a mutual goal, sometimes not. Sometimes the two parties are equal in status, sometimes not. The next two weeks I’m going to write about professional partnerships.

Often we think about partnerships a boyfriend/girlfriend or romantic partner. Those relationships are important, but for sake of this blog, consider these partnerships: mentor/mentee, teacher/student, sales lead/salesperson, manager/artist and head coach/ junior coach. Many experiences are available for two people to work toward a goal and create an amazing experience.

In my own college/graduate experience, I’ve had an amazing opportunity to work on research with distinguished professors. While an undergrad at Northern Illinois University (NIU), I worked a semester doing cognitive psychology research. My influence was minimal at first. But, just sitting on weekly meetings and discussing an reading tool/game for kids was an amazing experience. At NIU I also had the experience of coding data for an I/O psychology professor, which lead me in a whole new direction in psychology.

In graduate studies, I also developed research, this time working more independently, and eventually designing my own thesis on the study of ‘efficacy and workplace commitment’. Here I had the opportunity to have unique experiences with a host of different professors with individual research focuses in the field of I/O psychology. In graduate school, the level of discussion and engagement is much deeper, and much more fulfilling . All of this started as a small idea with me just wanting to get involved in psychology research.

The funny thing is, I know so many people who say. Well, I’m just an undergraduate. Or, the thinks 'the things i'm interested in are “too out there”, “too boring”, “too non-academic”, fill in the blank!'

Not even a step is taken before people start retreating at the idea. So don’t let being inexperienced stop you from forming partnerships – none of us would ever grow we just stopped there. You don’t have to go it alone. There are all types of organizations to be a part of, things to do, connections to be made, and yes, partnerships to be created.

In these next two weeks, I’ll share antidotes pertaining from the bestseller “Power of 2: Elements of Great Managing” by Rodd Wagner and Gale Muller.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Great Speeches

Toastmasters Plus! former president Dave Burrage gave an insight to our group recently about 'great speeches'.



What are some of the great speeches?

Well here are a few, with a tag to identify the exact speech

Martin Luther King - I Have a Dream
John F. Kennedy - Inaugural Address
FDR - We Have Nothing To Fear but Fear Itself
Ronald Reagan - Mr. Gorbachev, Tear Down this Wall
Barrack Obama - A More Perfect Union




What makes these speeches great?

As a group we came up with a list of these attributes:

Relevant to their Time
Elegantly Written
Impactful
Concise - the excerpts we know are short, but impactful
Inspiring
Authentic
Occuring in times of Crisis




It's important to be familar with great speeches. These speeches may have been spoken as far back as 1932 (FDR's address to the nation), but they are relevant to the people alive today. Great words inspire, and these words from our world leaders have left an impression that will not be forgotten anytime soon.

Even if we do not have the world stage...maybe our words are as impactful in someone else's life



Excerpts from Great speeches:

FDR - First Inaugural Address (nothing to fear but fear itself speech)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amNpxQANk0M

Ronald Reagan - Brandenberg Gate (tear down this wall speech)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtYdjbpBk6A

Winston Churchill - We Shall Fight on the Beaches (War cry against Nazis)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkTw3_PmKtc&feature=related

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Curry International: Cultural Differences in Branding

India food is one of my favorite cuisines. I love asian food in general: Thai, Korean, Japanese, Chinese; but Indian food is notorious for it’s foods' variety of spices. The Indian subcontinent with the fertile plains of the Indus and Ganges river ( Sen, 15), and the rich cuisine of plants and spices have given its people one of the richest cuisines in the world.

So what’s your opinion of curry? Well maybe it depends on the type of curry we’re talking about. Purists in the curry market exist, but everyone seems to have a different opinion of what spices to use, and how much to use. Curry is different everywhere you go in the world. In fact, curry is so global, that it is hard to even get a solid definition of what a curry is. “Curry: A Global History” by Colleen Taylor Sen defined curry as “a spiced meat, fish or vegetable stew served with rice, bread cornmeal or another starch”. This is a much broader view then the Americanized view of curry being a distinctively Indian food.

Think of all the dishes across the world that are curried: American curried chicken salad, thai mussasmum beef curry, rending daging (Indonesian), buoi phuc trach (austrailian), nyama choma (east African), khichri (british). The global food ‘curry’ is branded differently across the world.

This applies in exactly the same way as organizations will brand themselves to the culture they exist in. Restaurants are the easiest example to explain, but any organization with multiple locations is going to have cultural differences across different nations.

Maybe by understanding this, we can have an appreciation of how culture shapes the products we use each and every day. How we brand ourselves, may be contingent on our cultural identities. Being an American, concepts like – individualism, assertiveness, standing out and questioning authority are very attractive. This could be significantly different in an east asian culture that values uniformity, group action, and harmony.

Even if India is largely responsible for the distribution of curry throughout the British empire and into neighboring territories, there is no true curry dish. Anyone who can appreciate the difference between northern Indian and southern Indian food can vouch for the intercultural differences of Indian food in general.

With that said, may the world continue to enjoy curry in it’s wonderful forms and fragrances.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Feedback Roles

The book used to discuss feedback for this blog post is Mel Siberman's "The Consultant's Big Book of Organizational Development Tools: 50 Reproducible Intervention tools and Activities to Help Solve Client's Problems."

There are multiple roles you can take as a feedback giver, consider:

1) Critic - This role is one where you take a questioning role. It is deconstructionist perspective, that points out flaws and problems with the current situtation.

There are definately appropriate times to take on a critical role, but keep in mind that unwavering criticism will probably lead to demotivation.

2) Image Maker and Scribe - In this role you take the dicussion to a visual plain. Take the ideas and chart them, or graph them, or draw them. Often having someone in the group take charge of visualizing the ideas is going to help get all the ideas noticed and accounted for. Could lead to really good organization of ideas.

3)Ideas Threader - In this role you help connect ideas to each other. As often happens, people come will have 'their ideas' advocate them. By having someone take on a 'ideas threader' role, you can connect ideas together, and possibly have a stronger or more creative solution. This role takes good listening and also leadership to help fit people's ideas together

4) Critical Reviewer - In this role you can summarize the ideas, you can vocalize the direction the group is going in and lead the group through the decision process. It is different from a 'critic' perspective, because at this stage you already have decided on ideas, and direction. You are making decisions to finalize, and tweek the group decision so that it is the optimum decision

5) Facilitator and Time Keeper - Make no mistake this is a huge feedback role. This role is where you are concerned about participation. You may not give feedback on the group decision, but you are keeping the group focused and on point. How much time does the group have to make a decision? How many people in the group are engaged in the decision making process?

Thanks again to Mr. Silberman for his fantastic book and providing these roles that I could expand on.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Feedback to Push Groups Forward (Part 2)

We're working on the 'Five Tips Everyone Can Use to Give Feedback'

3. Ask the person your giving feedback to about their skills and behavior. Make it a conversation. Inviting the person into the feedback discussion is just good sense. It is going to make everyone feel more comfortable. It will make the tone of the meeting more conversational. Also, it's going to build repore with the two people to build a stronger relationship.

Here's an example a sales manager could use when talking to one of their saleswomen.

1) What techinques did you use this month to maximize your total sales?
2) What methods did you use to most effectively use the sales leads?
3) How could we improve the team performance for next month?


4. Be Open and Impartial to Possible Outcomes - When you give feedback, you have to let the person respond the way they want to. Any attempt to use manipulation, or try to have a person be 'forced' to use a new behavior is only going to cause more difficulties in that relationship.

You can not control the consequences, you can only really influence the behavior. Of course we all have goals and expected outcomes that would be great. First, planning for consequences is not always practical. Secondly, there are ethical considerations if the only concern is the consequences.

5. Create the possibility for how individuals, groups and systems can improve. If your in a position to give feedback, be able to show where growth can take place. There is always room for improvement, so be a vehicle for positive change. We all have blindspots, and differing perspctives; so take the time to genuinely help others improve.



Book Recommendation - "Other People's Habits" by Aubrey Daniels.

This is book gives fantastic advice about organizational behavior management. Concise, clear, and very practical advice. It's applicable to many areas outside of the workplace, and is a great addition to your bookshelf.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Feedback to push groups forward

The book used to discuss feedback for this blog post is Mel Siberman's "The Consultant's Big Book of Organizational Development Tools: 50 Reproducible Intervention tools and Activities to Help Solve Client's Problems.

This is a fantastic book for organizational develoipment practioners (a.k.a. OD practioners). It involves addressing the practical problems of organizational behavior in teams. Chapters focus on group formation, conflict, coaching and feedback.

Feedback is critical to the millenial generation. According to Abanet.org, millenials need "supportive work environments" and have "demands and high expectations". So whether as a manager, or a peer, be prepared to give feedback to your younger bretheren.


Five Rules of Giving and Recieving Feedback Everyone Can Use (From Silberman's book):

1) Recognize Strengths - As my cousin pointed out to me recently, "Nothing motivates a person like praise." Strengths are not always obvious, but after repeated interactions with someone, you get some indicators about particular behaviors that make them effective in their position. Use any word you like: motivator, listener, organizer, creative force, flawlessly excecutes, or free-thinking maverick. There are all sorts of labels for strengths we have.

The importance of positive reinforcement can not be overemphazied if you want a workplace where people enjoy their work and perform at their best. Recognizing people's strengths can remind people of their contributions to the group or organization. This isn't too say there won't be conversations that require disipline or difficult topics that need to be discussed. Simply put most conversations requiring feedback should have positive reinforcment, and there is no better place to start then strenghs.



2) Describe Behaviors - People can alter behaviors. Framing things as "behaviors" gives responsibility to the individual to improve a behavior. If we frame something as personality factors, the criticism is virtually unchangeable.

Consider this example

1. "Bob, you are coming to meetings 5 minutes late"
2. "Bob, you are a tardy person"

By showing a person a behavior that is disruptive, they can then use the information to change. They either will or won't make a change. In a fair way, it forces the person to own that behavior.

Telling people they are this, or they are that is not only going to cause reactive behavior (probably more disobedience, or lack of concern), but ultimately may cause that person to negatively view themselves because of the reinforced frame words. Consider the negative impact of name calling or objectifying people.


Part 2 Later This week

Thursday, April 1, 2010

The Best Coaching Advice You'll Ever Get

Marshall Goldsmith, is one of the leading executive coaches today. He is a faculty memeber at Alliant University and founder of The Marshall Goldsmith School of Management.

Marshall has written some fantastic books including "What Got You Here, Won't Get You There" (2007) and his latest success "Mojo" (2010). He is really a brillant man, and just a fantastic guy. He even emailed me back about a request I had for one of his personal growth exercises - what a cool dude.

Anyway, here's the best coaching advice you'll ever get, from the master - Marshall Goldsmith

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1HUJ0yE6ys